Product Information Co-ordinator John Lynam leaves the business today after a career spanning 38 years. John spoke to the Bubble about his time with the Armitage Shanks and Ideal Standard.
When did you start with the business?
It was 3 October 1983. I had just left sixth form, having done my A-levels and was about to do a Degree in History, Geography and International Relations. The careers advisor suggested I go along to an interview for the experience. I lived in Hednesford and it’s about seven miles from Armitage but it might as well have been another country. There were no bus routes so I asked a neighbour to pop me along. I expected a 30-minute interview. Two-and-a-half hours later I came out and my neighbour wasn’t amused.
I was offered the job but I said, “No thank you. I’m doing my degree”. Due to an administration error my place at university had been given to someone else. I thought, “What am I going to do for the next three years?” I asked if the job was still available at Armitage, they said no but they invited me to come and speak to the then company secretary.
I was invited to become a commercial trainee, which was the company equivalent of a YTS scheme. You would spend a couple of months with various different departments and after two years there would be a bidding war for you if different departments wanted you. I went through the whole production process and had a couple of tricks played on me. In one of them, I was told to stand by the line and press this button every time something went past. I had a feeling the button would ring an alarm in an office somewhere every time I pressed it but I played along anyway.
After nine months I moved into my first proper job as a Customer Credit clerk which I probably wasn’t best suited for. I have numerical dyslexia so adding numbers up all day really wasn’t for me. I was watching the After Sales Team having a great laugh and I thought I’d like to do that. That was my next role and I really enjoyed that for the next four years.
I moved into Contract Management and then into the Export Sales Team and in 1998 I was given the opportunity to join product information, which was essentially a technical helpline, and I’ve been there for 23 years.
What have you enjoyed about this role so much?
In this role I get the opportunity to write long, complex emails and help people solve problems. I’m a bit of a frustrated writer so it suits me. I’ve also got a good memory – people have called me The Oracle. I have quite a bit of information between my ears and it comes in useful sometimes. People think I know absolutely everything, which isn’t true.
The golden period for me was probably 2008-2010 when I started taking on a bit more knowledge about standards and regulations. Reading dry documents and regulations is my natural habitat. I’m quite happy to sit in a corner and be asked questions. I get a lot of opportunity to write these emails, help people out and that’s where the job satisfaction comes from. I also got the opportunity to do the “Mr Mum” thing from 2003 for a few years, taking my daughter to school when she needed me to. The company was very progressive and understanding with that.
Any funny anecdotes from over the years?
Somebody called and they were converting a 16th century thatched cottage. They couldn’t get the bath up the stairs and they couldn’t take the roof off or the window out. They called and asked if they could saw the bath in half and then glue it back together. They wanted to then tile it and turn it into some sort of Roman bath. I told them very coolly that sawing the bath in half would invalidate their warranty.
I was asked if you could circulate alcohol rather than water in a whirlpool bath for an adult nightclub. I asked them if I was on the radio or something and they assured me I wasn’t. I said I would check and sure enough it you couldn’t fill it with alcohol.
What are your interests outside of work?
Red Dwarf (sci-fi comedy series) is one of things I’m known for. My wife Andrea and I have been together since we were 13, married at 22 and Red Dwarf started soon after. I’ve been to a few conventions too. My kids like it and I’m working on my grandkids too.
I’ve been following Formula One since 2008. Before then I had no interest but I saw something with Robert Llewellyn from Red Dwarf in it and that inspired me to go to a classic car weekend. Seeing a 1980s F1 car changed my life. This car came screaming past at 200mph and then seemed to turn at a right angle. The speed of it was incredible. I started watching it on TV and it has become a bit of an obsession.
My other massive passion has become pirates. I started watching Black Sails, a TV show which is based on the real history of the pirates of the Caribbean mixed with some fiction, so now I’m becoming obsessed with that too.
How does it feel to be leaving?
It does feel surreal. It feels like I’m no longer working at my dining room table rather than no longer working with the company. I find myself very busy with other things but it will take a while to adjust and come to terms with what I’m doing. My first department I worked in was where HR is now. I worked in there as part of the After Sales Team and just before we were sent home last year we were moved in there. It was the first office and last office I worked in. There’s only one seat and haven’t sat in.
How has the workplace changed over your time with the company?
My first day when I walked into reception, the head of security was a gentleman called Jack, ex-RAF with a handlebar moustache and if he didn’t know you, you weren’t coming in. These days we have swipe cards of course but then we had him. He was a very imposing man and a very efficient security guard.
Back in the day, having been told I had to wear a white shirt for school every day for years and having a fairly pale complexion that doesn’t suit white clothes, as soon as I had any choice I was wearing reds and blues. I was told that if I’d been with the company a couple of years before I’d have got into trouble as they had a strict dress code. It seems strange to think about that now.
I can remember being impressed by seeing a fax machine. People didn’t believe me when I came back and told them. We had a Telex in reception but that was about it. There was one computer in the whole company that people would queue up to use.
It was still very much a family firm back then. People from outside the area were strangers. Nowadays people come from everywhere but back then you had to be very careful about what you were saying to people as you could be insulting somebody’s mother or sister. You had to be discreet. That’s something that these days isn’t so prominent. It’s a good mix of people. And a 25-minute drive is long enough for me and it’s lovely to pass through Cannock Chase every morning.